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We are often asked by people what happens when they die.
here is some information.
Firstly, Exeter does not have a Burial Society. This is a
reflection of the fact that many people will not spend their
entire lives in the area. This means that you can plan in
advance what you want, without the restrictions imposed by
membership of something like the United Synagogue Burial
Society. You should also remember that there are no free
funerals. This community has officiated without charge at
the funerals of the homeless, and of the elderly severely
learning disabled. Fortunately, this is exceptional. This
community, in accordance with Jewish tradition, makes no
financial gain from peoples' deaths. At the same time, it
cares for their graves in perpetuity - in our case, we care
for the graves of those who died as long ago as 1751, and at
great expense.
Here are some options:
If you belong already to a Synagogue Burial Society, you
can carry on paying, and when you die all will be dealt with
by the burial society. The United Synagogue Burial Society
will always provide its services for its members, wherever
they die. If you are not a member, they usually charge the
equivalent of ten years' membership fees. Similar
arrangements are made by the Reform and Liberal communities.
They will usually make additional charges for taking your
body back to London, though.
If you wish us to be involved:
You can choose to be cremated or buried.
If you are cremated, a member of the synagogue is willing
to officiate at the crematorium, for which the usual charge
for a minister is made. This fee goes to the synagogue, less
any out-of-pocket expenses for the officiant. The order of
service usually follows the Liberal tradition, unless you
request otherwise. The crematoria at Exeter, Torquay,
Barnstaple, Plymouth, Taunton and Truro have all been the
venues for Jewish services. Some are able to replace their
cross with a Magen David. All are willing to remove the
cross for a Jewish service.
In case of burial there are also options:
- You can be buried at the Jewish Burial ground at
Exwick, which is owned and managed by Exeter City
Council. This is on a beautiful site overlooking the
historic city.
- You can be buried at the Jewish Burial Ground in
Paignton, which is managed by the Torquay Hebrew
Congregation. This overlooks the Bay, and is beautifully
maintained.
- Exeter can provide the services of a Chevra Kadisha,
to wash the body and dress it with the traditional
shrouds.
- We usually follow the order of service in the Singer
Siddur unless requested otherwise.
- We will always do our best to ask people to come to
make a minyan for kaddish if this is reuested by the
family.
- On occasion, we have officiated at burials at other
cemeteries in the South West.
What does it cost?
- The undertaker's fee for the arrangement of the
funeral, provision of the plain, simple coffin,
arrangements at the crematorium or burial ground
(including the digging of the grave). This will be about
£1500. We usually use Mitchell's of Exeter, but
other undertakers are also able to provide a similar
service, and are very cooperative. They allow the
congregation to use their premises for tahara.
- The fee at the crematorium, which is about
£1000, or the fee for the burial site. The cost of a
burial plot is about £1000 - less if you live in the
Exeter City boundary.
- If tahara is performed, travel expenses are needed
for those who give up their time to perform this, and the
cost of the shrouds. This will usually be about £100
in total.
- The fee for the officiant, which is standardised at
£75. If you wish a rabbi to attend, this will be
from London, Bristol, or Bournemouth, for example, and be
by arrangement with them. We can help make contact.
Other Information
- Please note that the Synagogue does not in fact make
a charge for its services as such.
- The Old Jewish Burial Ground at Bull Meadow is now
closed for burials, though it is still maintained by the
congregation, who own it.
- We provide soil from Israel to place in the coffin
before burial.
- The synagogue is usually able to print and provide
Orders of Service for a funeral. These are in English and
Hebrew. They are provided free of charge, and can be kept
by those attending the funeral.
- Very often, the majority of those attending a funeral
will not be Jewish. This is allowed for, and they are
included in the service. This is especially so where the
partner and other members of the deceased's family are
not Jewish. For the same reason, at a cremation we will
allow if requested some appropriate music, and some
flowers will be permitted. Flowers are not usual at a
Jewish funeral in England, but are usual in some Jewish
communities abroad, including Israel. Special
arrangements are possible at Exwick and Paignton for the
burial of non-Jewish spouses.
- It is a very good idea to write a clause in your will
making clear what you wish to happen when you die. Some
sample wording can be provided. It is also a good idea to
make financial provision for the arrangements, in your
will, or in some form of savings. Organisations such as
Age Concern offer savings plans.
- May you live to 120!
Please contact us if you would like
more information.
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